IVF Babble

Erin Holland shares her heart-breaking IVF story

Anyone’s IVF journey is a difficult one, full of emotion and often one that people choose to keep to themselves through fear and trepidation

But embarking on a fertility journey when you have fertility problems is one that affects so many of us, so when someone in the public eye talks openly about their experience, it helps anyone struggling in silence to know that they’re not alone.

Which is exactly what Erin Holland has done. The 33 year old Miss Australia contestant, model and TV presenter has told her Instagram followers of her heartbreak in a tearful post, saying, “Last year, we found out the only real option to have a baby for me is IVF”.

She speaks of feeling like a “failure” as she feared “letting down” her husband, 35 year cricketer, Ben Cutting.

“As someone who went in just wanting to freeze embryos until the time was ‘right’, I’ve grappled with the confusing feelings of the loss of any ‘normality’ of this process, feeling like the universe was telling me I’m not meant to be a mother, the guilt of letting Ben down, but am I even ready, feeling physically broken.”

“Yesterday we found out that our first round of IVF resulted in nothing viable, and the sense of failure is overwhelming. The toll on the mind and body, the injections, the cost.”

“But I’m so grateful for modern medicine – it will take a village to create this baby, let alone raise it. The fact that IVF is even a possibility blows my mind.”

“I know it’s only the very beginning of this journey, and I thought about only sharing it when it was over, if ever.”

She finished by saying that hoped that by sharing her journey, it would reach others going through a similar experience.

The couple have had their fair share of difficulties since getting married last year. The Covid pandemic meant that Erin and Ben had to spend their first few months as a married couple apart as Ben needed to stay in an isolation bubble before going overseas to pay cricket.

At the time, Erin told Stellar Magazine, “Two days after our wedding, he left for four-and-a-half months, and I wasn’t able to visit as we weren’t able to leave the country. It feels a bit never-ending at the moment, the roadblocks to spending quality time together.”

“It’s really not easy. I have a huge amount of respect for the WAG contingent. There are a lot of misconceptions; it’s absolutely not the glamorous lifestyle that people might think it is.”

“For me, mental and physical health are very intertwined. If my physical health is right, my mental health is, and if I’m not feeling great mentally, I’m feeling sluggish and not wanting to look after myself physically.”

As the couple continue their fertility journey, we wish them so much luck and love.

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