US actress Gabrielle Union has spoken out about her fertility journey and compared it to an ‘underground railroad’.
The 46 -year-old has been married to basketball star Dwayne Wade since 2014 and said before she met her husband she had no desire to have children.
But after getting married all that changed. Wanting to have babies with Dwayne was a natural desire and said she had fallen in love with motherhood.
She was diagnosed with adenomyosis in her early 20s and had nine heartbreaking miscarriages before deciding on surrogacy to realise her dream.
The couple welcomed five-month-old Kaavia James late last year.
She told the latest digital issue of Glamour magazine that it was a challenge to find factual information about infertility and what a hard decision it was to choose surrogacy.
She talks about Instagram lives and the perfection of it all and how false it is.
“So much of the Instagram life is creating these perfect illusions, right? People have lids – even through surrogacy and IVF or whatever – and the kids just appear. Rarely do we hear how,” Gabrielle says.
Which is one of the main reasons the couple have been so open about their own journey
“What was your journey? Without understanding what got to baby, it feels like easy and overnight. And that is not the case.”
She understands that not being able to have a child can leave women filled with shame.
She said: “Nobody was really open when I had questions. The process was like an underground railroad of fertility, a complicated secretive ordeal that few people, and even fewer people who looked like me were talking about openly.”
She added that by sharing her story, she hopes that it will make women feel less isolated and remove the shame.
Did you have a surrogacy journey? Did you feel like you had to keep that process a secret? Email us with your story, firstname.lastname@example.org